The Elements of Life and Death (SHORT STORY)

I would like this critiqued please~

 

:A NEW HOPE DAWNS:

A brisk walk on a hot, sunny day; a teenage girl alongside of a scruffy young man. The girl brushed sweat from her forehead, then pulled her scarf down below her mouth.


"So Igo, you wanted to go to the lake? I know it's been a while but-" the elder male stopped in front of her, staring down at a crater, edges dry as sand but down at the bed it was very damp and soft. "... eh?" She looked down as well, soon realizing why he was staring.


"Aeris..." The young man muttered, "it's been a hot summer, without... her around to tend the waters, it's turned into muck! Fire and wind will only dry it further, you and I cannot fix this on our own."


The young girl held out her necklace, a small blue crystal at the bottom that shone in the sunlight. "Maybe this can help."


"No, it can't." The man grunted. "You solely specialize in wind, only she can use water." He looked off in the distance. "Let's just hope that once it reaches spring the drought will have maybe solved itself."


"Maybe?! We can't dwell that long on a mere possibility!" Aeris looked down at her necklace again. "I want to know that this town can still be safe. The people need their water!"


"There's nothing we can do. Hope is the best thing we've got." Igo then walked away, Aeris still staring down at the dried-up lake, but soon enough she left too.


--


Back at the town, Aeris had entered a local restaurant, then took a seat at the bar. The server up front chuckled a bit to himself, a hearty old man with a big, bushy moustache.


"Oh hey, it's you again! What can I getcha?" The server smiled genuinely, a very warm, comforting kind of smile.


"Oh, just the usual."


"Heh, you got it!"


Later, she is served a steamy bowl of hot noodles soaked in meaty broth. Aeris picks up her chopsticks and quickly starts scarfing down the noodles.


The server laughed a bit, then got serious. "You should probably savor this meal, we're closing up shop tomorrow."


Aeris paused, glancing up at him, then slurped up the last of the noodles. "Closing?! You can't go!"


"I'm sorry kid, but business has been terrible all season, we've run low on food because it's been so brutal for agriculture." The server sighed heavily. "I don't know how it will turn out, but I only hope things will look up soon."


Aeris finished her bowl, then dropped some coins in front before leaving. Hope, she thought, do all these people just depend on possibility here?


She walked back into the forest, then climbing up the stairs to a treehouse. "Finally, I'm home."


After getting herself comfortable, she spends most of the night lounging around, thinking heavily about the dry lake and the potential risk the townsfolk could be in if it pursues. It took her to nighttime, as she still couldn't get it out of her mind so she could just sleep in her hammock she had set up.


Uncomfortable shuffling in her bedding turned to her having nightmares, that vision of the lake clouding up her mind. She didn't know why, but it felt like such an important symbol to her.


Next thing she knew, it was dawn and she got no sleep that night. No time to sleep in though, she promised to spar with Igo. The drowsy girl stumbled her way out, and prepared for another tough day.


--


Igo and Aeris were locked in combat. For every flaming offensive attack by Igo, Aeris countered it with a defensive wind attack. They seemed evenly matched, until Igo blasted one final attack. Aeris dodged most of it, but was a split second too slow, resulting in a small burn mark on her thigh.


Igo quickly stopped to examine where her leg was seared. He pulled out a bandage to cover up the girl's wound.


"Are you okay?" He quickly asked reassuringly.


"Yeah, I'll be fine."


"You look pretty tired to me..." Igo suddenly glared at her with a concerned, fatherly look in his eyes. "How many hours did you sleep last night?"


Aeris stopped for a moment, then though for a good while. She seemed unsatisfied with the answer, however.


"Like, a few minutes..."


Igo suddenly looked even more worried.


"It's not like you to stay up all night. What kept you up?"


Aeris stopped, looking down at the amulet she wore the other day,


"You know, I can't say."


Igo looked down, inhaling deeply.


"Fine, just don't do it again."


--


Almost a week passed, and each night still restless for Aeris. When fumbling over to Igo one morning, visible bags around her eyes, he knew something had to be done.


"Aeris," Igo addressed her in a serious tone. "I want you to to stay inside while I go look for a way to cure this sudden insomnia. Just don't go anywhere until I come back."


"Alright, I will." Aeris slowly walked back up to her treehouse, Igo fading into the distance.


--


Aeris now lied down again in her hammock, her mind racing as the image of the lake re-entered her subconscious. Moments later, she rose, and walked out of her home; then crept outside, on her way to the dry crater.


As she walked, her mind felt blurred and cluttered. It just couldn't rest, not until this is solved. She held on to her chained azure gem delicately hung over her neck and dangling over her warm chest.


She was now right at the ledge, dust blowing over her feet from a small breeze. She breathed deeply, then opened her eyes wide again.


"How on earth can I help? I know there isn't much, but I have to do something!" Aeris was quietly talking to herself, her voice delicate and breathy.


"Please, give me something to rely on as a savior. Something that doesn't require a 'maybe'. Just, a clear sign is all." She finished her monologue, then there was silence. Soon after, she closed her eyes with long, runny tears following.


"What am I saying? There's no escaping it, we failed! Why do we even bother- ..!" She was quickly cut off as the ground beneath her crumbled, causing her to slide into the crater.


Luckily enough, she caught herself before falling completely in. However, she was too tired to pull herself out, let alone stay holding on. She breathed heavily, before muttering to herself.


"I'm just not strong enough..."


Soon after, the ground she was gripping broke, causing her to slide into the depths. Thinking quickly, she pushed herself off and created an air platform to stand on right over the muck at the bottom. It only held up for a couple seconds before dissipating, causing Aeris to plunge knee-deep into the slimey brown substance.


She looked down is disgust, before panicking in fear as the muck took her down to her waist, and kept slowly dragging her in.


--


All the while, Igo found nothing useful in stores. Besides, most of them were out of stock and closed immediately after the bad season.


Now, Igo headed back to Aeris's home before finding the door open, a clear sign she left.


"Aeris?" He hollered, before hearing faint screaming echo in the distance. He quickly turned his head the direction of the sound, then took off towards it.


Soon enough, Igo approached the lake to see her chest-deep in muck and still going in further.


"Aeris!" He shouted once again, trying to think fast. "Just don't make too many sudden movements! I'll try to find you a way out."


Aeris then looked up at him, and screamed.


"I think it's trying to eat me!"


Igo started racking his brain, but started to enter deep thought.


I need to do something! If I don't, this stuff will consume her and she'll be decomposed into fertilizer. Maybe it can harden with some heat.


Without hesitation, he tested this thesis by hosing an area of the muck with fire. The substance only boiled and bubbled.


"What the... What is this stuff made of?!" He shouted to himself.


"C'mon! I don't have much time left!" Aeris lifted her chin to the sky as the muck surrounded her shoulders.


Igo kept thinking, his mind becoming confused with fury. He then stomped his foot on the solid ground, surrounding himself in a rage of fire. The flames soon dissolved, and he clenched his fist, forcing out his words.


"I'm just not strong enough..."


Aeris's eyes quickly widened upon hearing those words.


"Wait! You can't say that. If I know anything about that sentence, it means 'I give up'. You're not a quitter! You are resilient, you can get me out of here."


"No, I'm limited on my abilities. I've become too soft, I fear." Igo started to run streams of tears down his face.


"You don't need strength in physical force or magic." Aeris sighed a bit before continuing. "You can be strong enough to save this entire town, because of your strength in love."


Soon after, Aeris's amulet starts to glow. Sudden raging rapids of water splash about the bottom of the pit, slowly filling it back up to becoming a lake again.


Igo looked back, feeling confused yet grateful.


"I'm coming Aeris!" He hollered before diving head-first into the cool, refreshing water. He propelled to the bottom, where he grabbed up Aeris with ease from the muck loosening its grip around her.


The two quickly surfaced, Igo carrying Aeris onto shore. He set her down in some lush grass, then started to perform CPR. For a while, she still wouldn't wake.


"Aeris, don't do this! You can't die now, we've just saved part of our water supply! Aeris?!"


He let go, she lay motionless. Soon after, she slightly moved her nose, then coughed. She then slowly opened her eyes. "Did we... Do it?"


Igo quickly embraced her. "No, you did it! How did you even manage to..?!" He looked down to see her sound asleep.


"Huh... So it was the dry lake keeping her up? No matter, she can have sweet dreams again." He smiled, before picking Aeris up and slowly carrying her back to her home.